Years ago I myself plagiarised and copied, I’m not proud of it, I remember how I felt when I opened the flaming email and read the first five condemnatory words, "You have stolen my work", guilty as Hell I went as cold as ice and I immediately fixed the problem and took the page down. I’ve repented, reformed and become enlightened and I wouldn’t do it again, but I’m surprised how many bastard sons of the village idiot there are out there frenziedly copying other peoples work and publishing it so that other imbecilic cretins can stumble in and be tempted by Mme Plagiarist who hasn’t had an original thought in her groggy, pointless and dull life, even Tony Blair our beloved ex-prime minister gave us the Dodgy Dossier which had been copied verbatim from Ibrahim al-Marashi’s University thesis on the "Iraqi invasion of Kuwait" and formed the main argument for taking us to war with Iraq, even though, as we all know, al-Marashi had copied it himself from some fat and feckless twelve year old school boy who had chained himself to his PlayStation 3 so he could kill Gay Tony in Grand Theft Auto IV therefore making his history project on Persia late and it had to be cobbled together at the eleventh hour from an old episode of Teenage Mutant Nija Turtles and series 9 of Roseanne the American sitcom, where WMD doesn’t translate as Weapons of Mass Destruction but Where’s My Dick! And like all twelve year olds, he publishes his homework on the school’s open forum to save the Brazilian Rain Forest which the CofE school doesn’t really care about because they send him home with a ten page newsletter once a week that they have plagiarised from the posh public school down the road… they’re all at it, why do I bother?

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